Glory and Gore
by Gloria Regali
Summary: After the defeat of Ragnar in Paris, many things changed. Ragnar's sons have grown since the last time they saw Ragnar. As has Iren, the adopted daughter of Siggy. Through the years Iren has grown into a fine shieldmaiden, trained by Lagertha, and gone on raids with Bjorn. She now has to get used to a different pace of life when Ragnar returns, and the world begins to catch fire.


**First Viking fic, please let me know what you think! Enjoy!**

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Ubbe walked across the dock with Hvitserk by his side, the worn timber gave out small cracks beneath their feet as the two princes conversed with one another. Both wore long cloaks to protect them from the frigid cold of the early morning air as it blew the smell of briny salt from the sea. The two laughed at something one of them had said, Ubbe clapping his brother on the back as a grin spread over her face.

Iren whipped her head around with a sharp gasp as Bjorn smacked her on the shoulder with his training stick, her bright green eyes widening in surprise.

"You can stare at my brothers on your own time," The eldest son of Ragnar spoke, walking around her in a circle, swinging the stick. "Right now is a time for training. You know if you get distracted like that in battle, you will die." Bjorn halted his orbiting of her and with his arms folded across his chest, gave her a stern look.

"I know that, I am not stupid." Iren answered swinging her training stick in her hand before moving back into her fighting stance, " do not forget I have fought beside you Bjorn Ironside."

"How could I forget?" Bjorn asked taking a swing at Iren, one which she blocked easily. She pushed him back and tried to strike her own blow. Turning quickly to the left, she landed a blow against Bjorns back. She shook her dark brown hair out of her face. It was pulled back with a few side braids but a few tendrils had still managed to fall free of the intricately woven style. She wore well fitting brown pants that had been tucked into her boots., A pale green shirt, made from a thick wool to protect her from the cool morning air while still keeping her cool enough as she exerted herself. It was held snugly to her torso by a wide leather belt going across the middle. Her frame was a strong build with well toned arms and muscular legs. Formed by the numerous years of rigorous training and several seasons of raiding that she had voyaged on, it created a steady look about her.

"Just making sure you do not forget." Iren smirked and ducked as Bjorn swung his stick at her head. She stood back up, quickly aiming at Bjorn's chest. The two went on like this for a while aiming and blocking blows.

"Why do you stare at them?" Bjorn asked with genuine curiosity as he pressed his stick against Iren's, moving her backwards slowly as Iren did her best to fight against his strength.

"I am not staring." Iren defended quickly.

Taking a hand from her own stick she quickly grabbed the back of Bjorns neck, and slammed his head into the two sticks. Bjorn stumbled back cursing quietly as Iren laughed with a smirk on her lips.

"You kind of do." Bjorn laughed shaking his head, "you are lucky they are so oblivious."

"Shut up. I've been friends with you all for a very long time!" Iren shook her head and raised her training stick, ready for another attack from Bjorn, "come on, let us train before you have to leave." Bjorn ran at Iren with a loud growl, but Iren moved out of the way at the last second, but Bjorn moved faster, turning and wiping Iren's feet out from underneath her, sending her to the ground. He then pushed his training stick against Iren's stomach causing her to let out a grunt as her breath was forced out of her.

"Just tell him." Bjorn suggested with a smug smile.

"No." Iren protested, bringing her own training stick up and slamming it into the side of Bjorns head. She sent a kick to his knee, giving her enough time to get up and promptly place her stick at his neck as he did the same to her.

"Truce?" Bjorn asked breathing in heavily. Iren nodded taking a few steps back and relaxing, "why won't you just say something?"

"Because it would not do any good." Iren answered waving her hand dismissively, "let it be Bjorn...please."

She looked at him with pleading eyes that begged him to drop the topic of their discussion. Seeing the pained look in her eyes, Bjorn took pity on his friend.

"Alright, alright." Bjorn answered, picking up his sword and placing it on his belt. "We train again tomorrow?" Iren nodded, placing the training stick back on a table, she picked up and mug of water and took a few moments to rest, Bjorn nodded and smiled lightly before leaving her alone.

Her solitude was not long as Ubbe and Hvitserk showed up ready to train. Hvitserk explained that Ivar and Sigurd had 'better' things to do than train with someone only a few years older than them. Ubbe did not seem to have a problem with it, him only being two years younger than Iren.

Ubbe attacked Hvitserk with a training stick. Hvitserk was able to deflect the blow easily, despite the strength and height Ubbe had on him. At some point in the training Ubbe had ended up on the ground but not before pulling Hvitserk down with him. Iren let out a sigh as the two sons of Ragnar wrestled in the dirt. Rolling her eyes, Iren got up from where she was sitting and wandered over to Ubbe and Hvitserk.

"Do you plan on fighting like that on the battlefield?" Her foot kicked Hvitserk in the leg causing the two to break apart, "because if you do, you will die, stupidly. You look like two little piggies wrestling in their own filth," Iren kicked Ubbe this time, her foot striking his shoulder, "now get up, and try again."

"Perhaps we would learn better if we fought with you?" Hvitserk voice caused Iren to roll her eyes and turn on her heel, walking away.

"Come on now," Hvitserk teased, "or are you not the shieldmaiden that people say you are?"

"And what have you heard exactly?" Iren folded her arms across her chest and turned to stare at Hvitserk. Hvitserk cast a quick glance towards Ubbe before giving her an answer.

"You are a seasoned warrior, despite being only being two years older than Ubbe." He stated , "we know that you must be good, or else why would our mother ask you to help us train, and why would you have gone raiding with Bjorn?"

"Well, if you believe that, why don't you stop messing around and start paying attention?" Iren mused and turned back around, but before she could begin to take a step, an axe flew by her head and landed in a nearby post. Iren froze for a moment before slowly turning to face the two sons of Ragnar. Hvitserk looked terrified with wide eyes and a gaping mouth. Ubbe on the other hand, had a smug smile as he leaned back on his elbows still on the ground

"It seems my aim has faltered." He replied in a cool voice. Hvitserk hit him on the arm, "she is going to kill you!"

"No she won't." Ubbe countered confidently, his blue eyes still looking up towards her with a mirthful glint, "I am a son of _Ragnar Lothbrok_." The name ran off his tongue smoothly. "She would be dead herself if she even entertained the idea."

Iren wandered over and stood in front of him looking down, "that does not mean I cannot kick your ass."

The words had barley left her lips before Iren hit the hard ground with a hard thud as Ubbe swiped her feet out from beneath her.

"Are you sure I am not going to be kicking yours?" He taunted. With a grunt Iren whipped her body to the left, breaking her leg away from Ubbe's hold, and slamming it back into his shoulder. Ubbe immediately let go as he released a loud grunt.

Hvitserk snickered, "you are dead brother!"

Ubbe shot him a warning glare as he got up onto his knees, a movement that caused Hvitserk to take off running. Getting up before Ubbe could notice, Iren knocked him back down with the hilt of her axe before taking a few steps back, allowing him to get up and retrieve his axe from the post it was embedded in. The moment he pulled it free from the wood, Iren attacked with a sturdy hit as she rammed her shield into his chest.

A smirk played on Iren's lips as Ubbe stumbled backwards from the blow. Ubbe shook off the blow and raised his axe again before clamoring towards Iren, bringing his weapon down from the air. Iren raised her axe stopping the death delivering blow. Before he could do anything else, Iren swung her body to the right and kicked Ubbe in the back, but not before he ripped the axe from her hand.

Leaving Iren unarmed, Ubbe smirked a bit before charging at her. Iren moved to the side in a circular motion, preparing to attack his back side. It was a strategic move butUbbe anticipated the move and quickly maneuvered himself to counter the attack. She was jolted backwards before being slammed to the ground as he looked down at the women proudly. Iren tried to get back up with a grunt, but his hand was still firmly hooked to her belt, as he pressed her into the ground.

"I win." He mocked, appearently amused by Iren's attempt to try and squirm her way out of his grasp.

It was not going to work and Iren knew she had to change tactics. In a flash she placed a cold bladed dagger on the soft part of Ubbe's neck.

"Not yet." She replied firmly, "you forgot to lock my arms, Ubbe."

Iren pressed the dagger harder against his throat, but not hard enough to draw blood. In response, Ubbe slammed his sword into the ground near her head, but it brought no reaction, as she kept looking up at the Viking.

"But you are still beneath me." He breathed out a laugh and leaned down closer, as if daring Iren to cut him. His right hand grasped onto the hand holding the dagger and struggled to take it from her grasp. His large hand pressed down on the pressure point of her wrist as he began to twist it uncomfortably. Slowly Iren felt her firm grasp begin to weaken from around the dagger.

 _I will not lose to Ubbe. I would never hear the end of it._ She thought still fighting to keep her hold on the handle.

Thinking of no other option, Iren took up an action that would surely surprise the male Viking. It was not an action she would take against an enemy on the field of battle. No, Iren would simply slit the throat of her opponent in the midst of battle. But Ubbe was not an enemy and this was not a battlefield. He was the son of Ragnar, a friend, and this was a training field for friendly sparring. Slitting his throat was simply not an option. But the other course of action was.

Lifting up her head she closed the distance between herself and Ubbe. In a rush, she set her lips to his in a soft kiss, her warm lips brushing against his more rough and chapped lips. It was brief but it had the effect she was she was hoping to result.

Ubbe, being surprised by the action, jolted back a bit. His hand loosening on her belt, and hand. Taking advantage of his faltering grip, Iren quickly kneed Ubbe in the stomach before shifting her weight against his. Together they rolled over and switched positions. Ubbe was now lying on his back in the dirt while Iren was now straddling his middle. With a triumphant glint in her eye she pressed the dagger against the upper part of Ubbe's throat once again.

"Looks like I won after all." She smirked

Ubbe stared up at her with a confused and surprised look on his face. After a moment he chucked, "that is a wonderful trick." His hands went to rest on Iren's hips, "turns out I like this ending a bit better." He smirked. Iren scoffed and got off of him before shoving his side with her foot.

"You are just disappointed you lost." She retorted as she picked up her axe and swung it a few times before placing it back on her belt. Iren began to walk away as Ubbe grabbed his axe and jogged to catch up.

"How many men have you used that trick on?" He asked as they walked further into the village.

"Why do you care?" Iren glanced at him, "I am sure you have your own tricks, and I have mine." She kept her eyes looking ahead, suddenly Ubbe grasped her arm and pulled her into a deserted corner between two buildings. Without warning he pushed her against the wall. Iren let out a small gasp, trying to move away with protest, but Ubbe blocked her. He leaned in closer, Iren could feel his warm breath graze against her chilled skin with each exhale he took. He left one hand pressed against her waist, while another still held her arm.

"How many?" He asked again, his voice just above a whisper and holding a darker tone as he stared at Iren. Iren studied Ubbe for a moment before a smile of mockery spread across her face.

"Why?" Iren challenged, puffing out her chest in defense to Ubbe's stern stare, "Is Ubbe Ragnarsson jealous?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Do I have something to be jealous of?" He inquired.

Iren simply laughed before shaking her head. "I do not believe so," She answered. Then, with a sudden shove, Iren pushed Ubbe away, "the others shall be waiting for us, and we should not keep them waiting."

The last thing she wanted to do was upset Aslaug, and her knowledge of Ubbe having a habit of being interested in several women at once kept her guarded. Ubbe looked at her for a few moments before backing away and holding his hands up in surrender.

"Alright, if you wish."

Suddenly a wave of embarrassment came over Iren, she muttered a thank you to Ubbe before retreating to the Earl's halls, trying to rid the flush from her cheeks. Iren was almost to the stairs when she heard Aslaug call out to her.

"Iren." Aslaug's voice made the girl turn as her eyes settled on the queen in a chair putting on her jewelry, "are you alright?" She continued, "you seem flushed and in a hurry."

"I...I," Iren cleared her throat, "I just don't want to be late for the feast." She stood there awkwardly glancing around.

"How did training go today?" Aslaug asked her eyes fluttering towards the girl, "Ivar would have joined but…he was tired, I did not think it was a good idea for him to over exert himself."

"Of course, I understand." Iren nodded quickly, "will he be at the feast this evening? I hear Bjorn will be here as well."

"Yes," Aslaug nodded, "they shall both be present. I left a new dress in your room, I hope you like it."

She smiled softly and gave a dismissing nod. Iren thanked Aslaug before quickly retreating to her room towards the back of the Earl's hall. She entered her room quickly and shut the door, leaning against it for a moment. Iren could not wait until tomorrow. She was already packed to go to visit Lagertha in Hedeby. She often visited Lagertha, and really only stayed in Kattegat out of respect for Aslaug and her generosity and of course for her early years of training with Bjorn. But she never really felt at home there.

Following the death of her adoptive mother Siggy, Rollo left, leaving Aslaug to house Iren. Because of this, she felt as if she owed it to Aslaug to stay at least part time in Kattegat. But she still never fully forgave Aslaug for her mothers death, and she supposed Aslaug knew that. There was always a coldness in her smiles towards Iren, so she left her alone as much as she could.

There was also her friendship with the sons of Ragnar that kept her in Kattegat. She had played with Hvitserk, Sigurd and Ubbe as children and always thought of them as good friends. But as of late, Ubbe had been trying to change her view of him. Something that was more than just the simple friendship they had shared for the past years.

Iren had feelings for Ubbe...or at least she assumed she did. Her stomach fluttered when he smiled at her and she always seemed to meet his gaze from across the room. But she knew Aslaug would _never_ approve of such a match. Most likely Aslaug was saving Ubbe for an alliance, so she had decided to leave things as friends. A feat that Ubbe was not making easy .

Iren shook her head and cast her thoughts aside as she moved towards her bed. Removing her leather armor and under shirt, she picked up the dress Aslaug had gifted to her. It was of fine material, one that would be expensive. The fabric was soft and thick, colored a dark violet, with a patch of a lighter purple running down the middle, with a slightly low neckline. It was hemmed with gold, and had beaded patterns across the chest. A thrall came into her room and helped braid her hair into a popular fashion. A braid on the left side of her head looped around to the back and fell down to the right of her shoulder with the rest of her lose hair. She heard the laughing and yelling from the main hall, and noticed the bright light of burning fires.

Iren recognised several of the Vikings, Bjorn, Floki, and Helga. Aslaug sat on her throne with Ivar beside her, talking to him dotingly. Sigurd sat playing his lute and laughing with his brothers. Hvitserk was of course talking to a women he had been fond of lately, but Iren doubted it would last long. Hvitserk was rather a wild child even though he was not really that violent. Ubbe looked over and sent a charming smile her way, his bright blue eyes looking her body up and down. Iren looked away from his lascivious gaze dismissively and took a seat next to Helga and Floki. She did not want to encourage Ubbe anymore after the events from earlier so she knew distance would be the best tactic.

"Iren, you look well. Training with Ragnar's son must be doing you good." Floki said with a giggle before taking a swallow of ale.

"It is good that you agreed to train with them." Helga smiled at her, and grasped Iren's hand, "Siggy would be proud." Iren smiled sadly and nodded, "thank you Helga. Training with them has been a challenge, but entertaining nonetheless. "

"Siggy would probably be even more proud of you if you married one of them." Floki joked, his tone full of mirth.

"I am not interested in marrying yet." Iren stated as she poured herself a drink, "and I know Aslaug is rather picky about who her sons marry."

"So why not you?" Floki pushed leaning forward to look at Iren, "they could do a lot worse."

"Floki!" Helga turned towards him in a fury.

"It is alright Helga." Iren waved a hand dismissively as she took a drink of the strong beverage, "you are not the first person to make that assumption Floki, and before you ask, no, I have not slept with any of them. They are my friends," she shrugged, "nothing more."

"You are the daughter of Siggy Haraldson, and a shield maiden, you would be a good wife to have." Floki answered taking another gulp, "second only to Helga of course."

"Adopted daughter." Iren reminded him raising her cup before taking another sip, "I do not want to marry anyone at the moment, Floki. It is as simple as that."

"Fine, fine." Floki grumbled seeming rather disappointed but did not push her any further.

"You may not be interested in marriage, but others might be." Helga whispered to Iren nudging her lightly as her eyes watched across the room.

Iren followed her gaze to see a tall viking with dark hair pulled back to accompany his dark features. Iren knew who he was. Cadoc, was one of the men that fought with Bjorn and went raiding with him. He smiled charismatically as he approached their table, his eyes set on Iren.

"Hello Iren." He nodded to her.

"Good evening, Cadoc. How are you?" Iren asked politely looking up at him.

"Fine." Cadoc nodded, watching the shieldmaiden intently, "and yourself?"

"Fine." She answered running her finger around the rim of her mug.

"Would you care for a drink?" Cadoc asked, setting his hand on the table leaning on it slightly. His black hair falling over his dark brown, his sword ever present on his belt.

"I am afraid I already have one." Iren answered holding up her cup.

"Then perhaps you could use another one?" Cadoc raised an eyebrow.

When Iren did not respond right away, Helga nudged her slightly.

"S-sure." Iren nodded hesitantly getting up and grabbing her cup before following Cadoc over to where the drinks were.

"I saw you training with Bjorn today." Cadoc spoke pouring more ale into her cup and then his.

Iren nodded, "Yes, I was. We train almost everyday, especially since we aren't raiding now."

"Would you care to train with me some time?" Cadoc asked boldly after taking a drink.

"Perhaps, but do you not usually train with others?" Iren moved away from the table to allow other people to get drinks. She sat on the edge of a table waiting for Cadoc's answer.

"I think, I would enjoy training with you much more." He smiled gently taking a few steps closer, his mouth inched towards her ear as he leaned in towards her, "much more...entertaining,"

"Is training suppose to be entertaining?" A voice inquired from behind the two.

Iren startled and turned to see the third born of Ragnar's sons approaching them. There was an odd look in his eyes as he looked between herself and Cadoc standing close to her. Iren was suddenly reminded of just how close Cadoc was standing next to her and she adjusted herself to gain some extra space between them. It was a moment that seemed to erase the disapproval that had been shadowed in Hvitserk's eyes earlier.

"Hello Hvitserk." She replied kindly, "I thought you were otherwise, preoccupied."

"I was," he shrugged and filled up his cup again, "but then I wanted another drink. Cadoc, I heard what you said about training, perhaps you would like to come and train with myself and my brothers sometime? If you want it to be 'entertaining'." He smiled.

"I'm sure it will be entertaining." Cadoc answered with a nod, "Iren, would you like to come?" She opened her mouth to answer, but before she could speak, Hvitserk jumped in.

"Of course she will." He grinned, "she has trained with us for a long time, her and Ubbe are…close friends." She sent him a warning glare.

"You will, won't you?" He asked her with a small smirk. She resisted the urge to sign before nodding slowly, "yes I can train. How about tomorrow?"

"Of course!" Hvitserk grinned before turning towards Cadoc, "tell me, what is your best weapon?"

Seeing as how Cadoc would not get out the conversation easily, Iren turned and planned to return to Floki and Helga. A bit unsurprised, she found her path blocked by none other than Ubbe.

"Good evening, Ubbe." Iren answered looking up at him.

"It would be better if you were not avoiding me." Ubbe answered letting out a soft sigh as he tilted his head to the side.

"I am not avoiding you Ubbe." Iren countered, "just spending time with Floki and Helga before I visit Lagertha."

She moved to walk past him, but he caught her arm.

"Yes you are avoiding me. Why?" he demanded. A spark of clarity came to his eyes a moment later. "Is it because of what happened earlier?"

"No" Iren hissed, "please let go of me Ubbe."

"No." He rebuffed as he shook his head and tightened his grip, "why won't you give me an honest answer? I know you liked it just as much as me…"

He neared closer as his eyes glinted with desire. She took in a sharp breath as he leaned down, his blue eyes never straying from her face. Unable to take the heat of his stare, Iren let her eyes wander around the room. She caught a glimpse as Aslaug starred at them with obvious disapproval of their interactions. As if Ubbe's touch shocked like Thor's lightening, she moved away from him as quickly as possible.

"Iren…" Ubbe went to grab her arm again but before he could, she ducked into the crowd leaving the viking prince standing alone.

"That was handled well." Floki chided sarcastically to Iren as she made her way back to the table. She shot him a glare before taking her seat next to Helga.

"I handled it like it should be handled." Iren answered curtly, "luckily, I am going to Hedeby soon, so this can pass on." She took a gulp of her drink, glancing at Ubbe as he settled back over with his family. Her eyes darted downward as Ubbe looked towards her. She sucked in a deep breath and downed the rest of her drink.

"Are you sure? Rollo never got over his first love." Floki muttered out. Iren froze at the name as a knot formed in her stomach.

"I am going to bed." Iren stood quickly, nodding to Helga and Floki before retreating to the back of the hall. As she walked she passed Bjorn who offered her a kind smile.

"Going to bed already?" He asked falling into step beside her.

"I do not feel like celebrating." The shieldmaiden shook her head.

"That is not like you." Bjorn replied still following her, "don't tell me you are tired already?"

"Maybe I am." Iren sighed but stopped walking.

They were in a secluded area of the hall, towards the back near the stairs that lead to the rooms. Silence passed between them as Iren stood still, her mind roving over the events of the evening. Suddenly she took in in a sharp breath and turned towards Bjorn.

"Have you heard anything of Rollo?" She asked quickly. Bjorn stood still for a moment, surprised to hear the name, before shaking his head.

"Iren, you _cannot_ keep asking me that." He looked at her with a tired expression.

"I know, I know…" Iren admitted while shaking her head from side to side as she mentally chastised herself of her moment of weakness, "but I cannot help it. I was too young to understand what had happened, and even now I only get half answers." She took a step towards Bjorn, "no one will talk of him. Not even Floki."

"For good reason. What he did..." Bjorn shook his head, "it is unforgivable. Forget him, Iren." Bjorn directed, his tone darker than usual.

"I can't!" Iren hissed in frustration, "Believe me, I have tried. Odin knows how hard I have tried but after Siggy died…he shut off. Shut me out. Bjorn, I was five years old when he left and never came back! Then, when you returned to Paris, I was stuck here! I-I never got to say goodbye! I never got an explanation." She frowned, "I know he is hated, and despised, and I know he wasn't my father…" Iren trailed off as she shook her head in dismay, "but…he was all I had left."

Her voice hitched slightly as she finished. She felt the sting of threatening tears and looked down at her feet to hide them. Steady steps of Bjorn's feet came into view when she suddenly felt the hair veiling her face being tucked behind her ear.

"That is not true." Bjorn said softly as he let his hand moved from her hair to cup the side of cheek in his hand and tilt her head up, "you have me, Torvi, Helga, and Floki…Ubbe?"

At the mention of the last name, Iren bristled.

" _Don't start_." Iren warned earning a sigh from Bjorn.

"You have Lagertha as well. You don't need Rollo anymore."

He smiled softly before placing a kiss on her forehead. He then departed without another word, giving her space to ponder his words. Iren stood there for a moment before continuing on to her room. Falling down onto the bed, she stared at the ceiling, her breaths becoming rapid. She did not want to cry. Especially not over someone who was not there and obviously did not give a damn about her.. Nor did she want to be angry, it was not worth the effort if there was no way to express it to a person of absence. But the more she resisted, the more she could not help it. The ire within her boiled and she had spent too many years trying to make excuses that her patience had been worn too thin.

She was angry at Rollo for doing what he did. For leaving her in Kattegat alone and confused with no explanation as to why She was angry at Aslaug for what happened to Siggy. It was because of her carelessness that she no longer had Siggy in her life. She was angry at Ubbe for looking at her. He was always giving her heated and intense looks that haunted her dreams. Finally, she was angry at herself for being angry. For giving into the temptation of rage and letting her emotions get away with her.

Pushing herself off the bed she pulled off her dress and changed into her training clothes. Grabbing her sword she made her way down the stairs, through the mass of Vikings, and finally reached the outside.

Cool air hit her, causing her to shiver slightly but she ignored the goosebumps that were spreading across her skin and began to march away from the King's hall. Taking a sharp left, Iren made her way to the training yard she was at earlier with Bjorn. Unsheathing the sword she approached a training post, and began hitting the post. Again, and again, each time with more strength. With each strike she released more frustration which drove her to add even more strength to her blows. Her mind was so focused that she nearly missed hearing the voice that spoke up behind her.

"What are you doing?" The intruder inquired. His voice was all too familiar and she did not need to look to see who it was.

"Training." She replied shortly.

"Like that?" There was amusement in Ubbe's voice as she heard him approach closer, "why?"

"Because," Iren hit the post again, "I am training my anger."

"A viking should use their anger." Ubbe pointed out. She hit the post a few more times before taking a few deep breaths.

"That is true, but I need to train mine." She turned towards Ubbe to see him pearch himself on a stool, "so it doesn't get the better of me."

"Why?" Ubbe looked at her quizzically.

"So, when I see him again, I can look Rollo in the eyes and ask him why." She spoke tersely, a sharp edge to her voice."so I can ask him why he just _left._ I imagine you would wish to ask Ragnar the same thing."

"If we see him again." Ubbe scoffed, "which I do not find likely." Iren nodded and sat down on an empty stool across from him.

"Do you ever wonder what they are doing?" Iren asked after a while of silence, "Rollo and Ragnar?" She looked up at Ubbe.

"I don't think it matters." Ubbe answered looking at her, "they aren't here where they are needed and should be Obviously they do not care, otherwise they would be. We need to get use to that."

"I am used to it." Iren admitted, "I am used to Rollo not being here. That isn't the problem." She shook her head.

"Then what is?" Ubbe asked his voice softer.

"The problem is that…" Iren stared at the ground, "I don't think he ever cared. After Siggy died, he just…stopped trying, period. He used to give me attention but now I wonder if it was only all for Siggy. Then when paris happened…and he didn't look back. Not at Ragnar, not at Lagertha…not at me. But perhaps I expected too much from him. Perhaps I am right and he wasn't who I thought he was."

"A father?" Ubbe guessed.

"Not exactly…" Iren looked up, "I never really saw him as a father. Not like how I saw Siggy as a mother. But I did feel safe with him. He made me feel safe. Like…if there was danger he would protect me. That if he had to make a choice, he would choose me without question," she shrugged, "I remember when I was little he taught me how to hold a sword. He told me stories, and he would put me on his shoulder and walk around." She smiled sadly, "it was stupid though. To think that if Rollo was given a choice between power and…me or his family, that he would choose us."

"I would have chosen you." Ubbe answered softly. Iren looked up to find Ubbe already looking at her.

"I will chose you. If you just give me the chance." He spoke again.

"Ubbe…" Iren shook her head but Ubbe cut her off.

"Do not make this about my mother. She has no plans for marriages for me, except she thinks that I should be married." He explained, standing up.

" _Not_ to me." Iren pointed out.

"Why not!" Ubbe countered, "you are a successful shieldmaiden, well trained, and good. You are kind, and beautiful." He walked towards her slowly and Iren felt her heart begin to beat fast with every step he took.

"I am not royal, I cannot offer you alliances, or wealth." Iren countered as she stood up as well, getting ready to run away, "that is what Aslaug wants."

"That is not what _I_ want." Ubbe replied still walking towards her. Iren took a few steps back bumping into a rack of weapons.

"You don't know what you want Ubbe. You are too young. We both are." Iren swallowed as her throat became dry, "I have seen you with other women. You are not ready to settle down."

"Who says we have to settle down?" Ubbe asked taking even slower steps as he got closer, "we could simply just get on a boat and sail away. Together. Leave this world behind."

"I made a habit of trusting Lothbrok men…and most of it did not end well." Iren sucked in a deep breath as Ubbe came to a stop only a few inches in front of her, she could feel his stare as she looked down at their feet, only inches apart, "Ragnar, Rollo…"

"Don't think about that. " Ubbe ran his fingers up her arm gently, "don't think about any of that."

"Then what do I think about?" Iren breathed out, as a shiver ran up her spine. Ubbe trailed his fingers along her arm, across her shoulder, up her neck and finally stopping at her chin. Tenderly he lifted her chin up, his eyes meeting hers.

"This." He whispered before closing the distance between them with a soft kiss.


End file.
